Music

I have detected more than a slight whiff of common identity between the Affordable Care Act and Lady Gaga. Or more precisely, between their audience--which grammatically does not make sense. But in America 2013 explains nearly everything wrong in the country today. Lemme explain, my little pumpkin. The other day as I was navigating like Amerigo Vespucci around the bad Cape Horn back in the day of fearless sea-going Italians unhappy with what they had and hellbent for leather in their pursuit of a two-horse-and-buggy garage with accompanying villa, I was somehow or other guided by the net to a telephone connection with Kathleen Sibelius's office. The phone message quite impersonally told me: "You have reached the office of Kathleen Sibelius. Our hours are nine a.m. to five p.m. Monday through Friday. Please hold." Lady Gaga's new album, the artless Artpop, clicked on. Ugh. Horrible. More re-fried, re-shat Madonna-meets-Barnabas-Collins-in-a-dressing-room-built-for-a-fool that Britney's too good for.

I’ve been going to record stores my whole life. I am a weirdo so vocationally record stores have been there for me. I worked at Magnolia Thunderpussy Records from 2003-2011. I currently work at Roots Records. Today is Thanksgiving.

Fucking Christmas is coming and don't we all hate it? Well, I don't mean I hate it. I love actual Christmas itself. The trees, the kids, the myths and the magic and the food. But not the hideous modern goddam bullshit that comes with it anymore. Like my neighbor having her lights up BEFORE Halloween. Like the mega-commercial exploitation of the beautiful gesture of giving. Like seeing or reading about the mobs of crazed consumer-zombies trampling and fighting over X-boxes and the like. The ACLU public square manger lawsuits. Too much pressure! Disgusting! Pass me one of your grandma's Christmas cookies, will ya? Mmmm, now that helps (munch, munch, gulp). Let's not blame the Baby Jesus--little sumbitch is the most blameless one in this passion play of insanity, none of which in my book has anything to do with true Christianity. Jesus, I'm fairly certain, wouldn't be thrilled with stores open on Thanksgiving or the very concept of Black Friday.

My little brother has down syndrome. He loves music of all types. But his defaults are Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, Katy Perry and Lady Gaga. Because he likes female pop singers, I played him Sky Ferreira a while back. My logic was that he could watch a burgeoning pop artist before she got big. He loved it. We went and saw the Venice Beach born/Brooklyn singer play with How to Dress Well at the end of March at the Basement. I visited him the next day and he was watching Sky’s video for “Everything is Embarrassing.” It was cute because he gave the computer a kiss. I noticed on line that she had been at “Party City” by the Carriage Place Cinemark Movies around the same time and I thought about posting a missed connection for my little brother. I did not because fan fiction is creepy even if it’s harmless. But when I found out that Sky Ferreira was playing the A & R Bar with the Smith Westerns Thursday, I got permission from his dad to take him out. His Bible study was out for Thanksgiving break so everything was kosher. I was happy to see Chicago indie-rock band Smith Westerns play before Sky.

Eye is Adam Smith from Dead Sea, Matt Bailey of Teeth of the Hydra, ex-Pretty Weapons members Brandon Smith and Matt Auxier. From this roster one could probably ascertain Eye is probably a well-executed, heavy and deep journey into the intersection of psych, space, stoner, progg, metal and the avant-garde with Pink Floyd and Black Sabbath as touchstones. Like any good space-rock band, Eye draws influence from science fiction, fantasy, altered consciousness, nature and life in general. I queried Eye’s vocalist, Moogist, Mellotronist and guitarist Auxier on what science fiction style-problem is looming in reality. His response: “Space migration. Are we ever going to be able ever to venture somewhere else to start a colony? Because we are ruining our planet! We have to figure something out in the next 50-100 years.” He views saving the earth as better described as saving ourselves. “The earth will destroy us all if we don’t figure something out. It’s probably too late. The Earth may still be here, it may just wipe us out on the way.

Life on Planet High Street is like life on the shores of an ocean on a far-distant earth-like orb: freaks and geeks rolling by like driftwood; human reptiles and upright dudes and dudettes crawling forth from the primal liquid, the good with the bad; and as always, the interminably ugly with the remarkably beautiful as well as the forgettable in-betweens. Circus time! Working on the city's endlessly fascinating main north-south thoroughfare in the campus area in an ossifying profession known as 'record store,' there have been one or two lethargic days in the last 20 years. But I don't remember them. There is simply too much non-stop action. Like the aging retired American army colonel who owns an antique store in Old San Juan said in Yankee-fied Spanish of his environs, "Nunca un momento aburrido" ("Never a dull moment"). And sometimes these creatures make a sharp left- or right-turn and enter my world. Everyone's greeted with a detached hello but a greeting nonetheless. Their response helps clarify my involuntary survival-instinct gathering of impressions which started the moment they entered my eyesight.

As I was leaving Sunday Night’s Slayer show at the LC, I saw a group of disheveled, rotund men wearing matching shirts that said “Cleveland 216 Juggalos.” I chuckled at the idea of a group of dudes putting on the same outfit and driving two hours so they could represent their local chapter of Insane Clown Posse Fans. I also thanked Allah, God, Jesus, Richard Dawkins, Jah, Jehovah, Clarence 13x and Lucifer that when I was young and rebellious ICP was not an outlet for my adolescent desire to identify with the ugly and appalling because of youthful, Holden Caulfield-style cynicism. I will admit to wearing a Slayer “South of Heaven” shirt to church and catechism in middle school and might be coming from a slightly similar place, but at the end of the day Slayer has made music that most anyone will admit to being classic, and legendary. Sunday at the LC was another classic night performed by the legendary Thrash metal band. Slayer played an “old school” set. Their longtime guitarist and songwriter Jeff Hanneman died in May of liver failure at the age of 49.

Tony “Doctah X” Harrington is a Reggae-rooted musician, singer and deejay who explores dub and dubstep often with Eastern and African Sounds. Doctah X recently released “Bangkok Chili” on North Carolina-based Boom One Records. This was a follow-up to his 2011 album “Agent of Kabul.” He hosts and deejays a radio show on WCRS called “Perscriptions” which airs Fridays from 9-10pm. He is one of those Columbus gems with a rich history. In the 70s and 80s, as a blues guitarist, Doctah X recorded and toured in Europe with Cream drummer Ginger Baker and played with blues legends John Lee Hooker, Albert Collins and Lele Gaudi. He also recorded with Umar Bin Hassan of the Last Poets. FP: Put together your fantasy band, dead or alive DoctahX: Jimi Hendrix and Eddie Hazel-guitars, Bernie Worrel, Jimmy Smith-keys and organ, Jaco Patorious -bass, Sly Dunbar-drums, Dr.

The usual areas of distinction in central Ohio are the realm of sports – Buckeye football and, less often, basketball. Angela Perley and The Howlin’ Moons are blazing a new path of distinction for central Ohio in music. I heard them the first time this past summer at a free Sunday concert at the Gazebo in Goodale Park. My reaction was simply, wow! these guys are from Columbus? Led by singer-songwriter Angela Perley, a 27-year-old from Hilliard and graduate of Ohio University, she and the Howlin’ Moons have an original, captivating and exciting sound that is unforgettable. Rather than try to describe Angela and the Moons myself. I will cite other recent reviews: "Angela is a total original, thoroughly unique; Cross between Michelle Shocked and Lucinda Williams and that’s a heavy compliment in itself." - Jon Peterson, Shakin It Radio (Dec 03, 2011) This was the first band I have heard in decades that made me smile. Perley wears 1950s shades behind a knowing smile as she sings out her warm, captivating lyrics and she plays – a saw - yes, a woodcutting handsaw – like nothing you've ever seen before. The Howlin’ Moons are more than competent musical backup for Perley.

Columbus rapper King Vada is celebrating the release of his new EP “Flowers Before I Go” with a show at the Circus tonight, Thursday November 14th. The rapper formerly know as Lxe For the Uncool released an EP back in August called “Murder Flowers.” King Vada’s 2013 catalog is blooming more than the Franklin Park Conservatory. My best idea to woo a lady is to bring over a pizza and a bouquet of whippets so I decided to ask King Vada’s advice on what types of flowers to bring a lady during the courting process. Vada responded, “Tulips. That would be my personal choice. Most people would bring roses though.” King Vada added, “On my birthday, I give my mother Roses.” De La Soul’s “D.A.I.S.Y. Age,” Wale's "Lotus Flower Bomb" and Jay Electronica’s twitter bio aside, one doesn’t hear about too many rappers bigging up romantic botany so I asked what’s up with the floral in the King’s arrangements. Vada’s explanation for the EP titles boils down to appreciation, “It’s a Kanye quote, ‘Give people the flowers when they can smell them.’ It’s just saying. ‘Give me my flowers now. Give me my props now... Don’t wait until I have passed away.